P.S. I can't hear my feet
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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