Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize