The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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