i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
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