i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
you will always have a special place in my vag
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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