I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I enjoy the company of your penis
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Never underestimate the power of titties
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
