I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
pray to the hookup gods
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
