so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Can I color on your dick again?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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