new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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