for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
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Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
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That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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