Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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