ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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