i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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