somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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