I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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