Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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