I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
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