So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Found the puke drawer
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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