He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
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