he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
