Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
