At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
