dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
My feet surprised me
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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