there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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