My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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