This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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