all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
