i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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