i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
