He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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