If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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