She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
we made out on top of his cat.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
