So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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