I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
