Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
