I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize