I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
