Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(269): View more from Michigan

So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!

Fav 17 4791 902
share tweet
(925): View more from California

Wait, how do girls masturbate?

(1-925): View more from California

I dunno we use shower heads I guess.

(925): View more from California

..how does it fit?

Fav 85 2393 6171
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(815): View more from Illinois

Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.

Fav 22 2092 6162
share tweet
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.

Fav 9 1188 4634
share tweet
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?

Fav 33 1276 7390
share tweet
(256): View more from Alabama

I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.

Fav 18 3556 1371
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"

Fav 5 703 1919
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(727): View more from Florida

Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am

Fav 1 671 338
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(919): View more from North Carolina

idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?

Fav 1 46 4
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT