My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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