I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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