Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize