I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
