How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize