Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Randomize
