Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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