ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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