Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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