508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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