dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I need to wash the frat house off of me
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
