her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
